Flames

You cannot say you have truly experienced the "joy" of the
internet until you have been flamed. If you've ever been flamed
then you understand how it feels. If not, then don't worry - it
will happen and it will not feel good at all. In fact, on my
first flame I wanted to cry ... it was pretty bad.

Recently I wrote an article and posted it to a moderated list. I
received an incredibly covert letter back which more or less
told me I was worthless, my article was worthless and anyone who
agreed with what I had to say obviously had the intelligence of
a small soap dish.

Oh, how I wanted to send back an email mega-blast with enough
vile energy to turn the author of that flame into a small pile
of atomic ashes! I hit the reply button and typed in words which
would have reduced my target to a pile of quivering protoplasm -
then I hit delete. Why bother? Flamers are just waiting for
opportunities to send flames. By responding in like manner, we
are just throwing gasoline onto their fires.

What is a flame?

A flame is a negative response to an email, newsgroup posting or
instant message which is derogatory and attacking.

What are the characteristics of a flame?

A flame is always derogatory. It virtually always personally
attacks the author (not the subject of the email) or the group.
They are much like arrows shot directly for the heart of the
writer or another member of the discussion, and their intention
is always to belittle someone.

Sometimes flames can be very subtle and covert. In fact, some
flamers spend countless hours creating messages which seem to be
positive but actually covertly rip one or more group members
down.

How do you tell if a message is a flame?

Flames are virtually always personal attacks on the author or
another participant in the discussion. Sometimes they are
blatant attacks and sometimes they are very covert, but they
are always attacks on group members or the author of a message.

Are flames always responses?

No, an original posting can be a flame. However, they are
usually in response to a posting.

Do flames serve any useful purpose?

No. A flame belittles and degrades other human beings. They
serve no useful purpose at all.

What should be done when a person flames?

In an email, just ignore the flame. In a newgroup or other
moderated list, this is where the moderator steps in and
exercises his responsibilities. The moderator might start by
calming the group, asking the flamer to stop, and so on.

What should be done if a person continually flames?

In a group it is essential that the person be banned. Otherwise,
your group will eventually degrade and fall apart as people tire
of being insulted. Never put up with flamers in a group.

In an email, add the person to your spam filter list so you
don't get his messages anymore.

How do you tell if a message is a flame?

It contains a personal attack against someone or some people in
the group.

Are all heated messages flames?

No. Only those that contain attacks against group members. It is
okay and actually important that groups have heated discussions
now and then. This is a part of communication. It is also
important that people have good manners. There is no need to
yell, scream at, degrade or belittle other human beings.

One good example of a group that got very heated was the Yahoo
Club WebRingNews. The moderators of the group did not understand
the difference between intelligent, adult, heated discussion and
flames, so they simply banned everything they didn't agree with
or that seemed controversial.

A good moderator encourages debate. A bad moderator allows
flames to continue.

What is a flame war?

Flame wars are a series of messages and replies which are
more-or-less mud slinging matches. Someone will post a message
and get a flame as a response. He will flame back. This will go
on for a while and others will join in on the fun. Before long
you may have dozens, hundreds or even thousands of vile messages
flying back and forth.

What kind of people flame?

Well, we probably have all flamed occasionally in our internet
lives. I know in the heat of the moment I've written some emails
which I later wishes I could retrieve.

A flamer, however, is person who lives to flame. That's what he
or she wants to do. They enjoy degrading other people.

So what kind of people are flamers? People who are not worth
responding to because they have no respect for anyone, including
themselves.

What should we do about flamers?

Pity them.

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